By Robin Bornstein, Reiki Practitioner at the Healing Place

I recently had a chance to spend some time with old friends. We started discussing the act of self-love. Who has it, who doesn’t, and how does one create self-love?

My friends wanted to know how I had achieved self-love and a mindset positive thinking. Believe me when I tell you that this was not always the case. My old friends remember the times when I wasn’t always so cheerful and positive.

To me, self-love is the act of self-acceptance, which is accepting the wonderful and not so wonderful things about ourselves. It means being able to truly appreciate our faults, and accepting that maybe just maybe it’s OK to not be “perfect”. Self-love and acceptance comes with personal and spiritual growth, and requires being attuned to the voice inside your head.

Positive self-talk is important to create personal and spiritual growth. If you constantly complain and focus solely on the negative experiences, you may find yourself becoming stuck in your negative-talk, which can lead to unhappiness. I believe that nobody wants to be unhappy. Being unhappy is easy, but freeing yourself is just as easy to achieve when you participate in daily positive thinking. Talk to yourself the way you would want someone to talk to your inner child. Be nice to that little voice in your head. Stop and listen to the negative voice that comes up, and take a moment to understand why it is you are thinking and feeling that way. When you hear the negative voice, try to catch yourself and start talking back with positive thoughts. It’s all in how you spin that little inner voice.

Unfortunately, some people don’t realize that they are constantly consumed by negative thought processes. We all know people who are stuck here. A simple exercise: The next time you encounter something negative that makes you angry or frustrated, try calming yourself down with positive thinking while focusing on your breathing. For example, when someone cuts you off in traffic or slams on the brakes and makes a turn without a blinker, we all want to shout and make nasty comments in the privacy of our cars. I started practicing my traffic light meditation technique when I encountered annoying drivers. First I take a deep breath and then I say something positive out loud. It’s a great way for me to stay positive in the crazy, fast-paced world we live in today. I have my slip-ups on occasion, but I’m getting really good at stopping and turning the slip-up into a positive thought. Try it. It really can turn a bad day into a good one. By practicing this simple technique while driving, or during any negative encounter, you will notice your positive and negative thought processes.

Another important aspect of positive self-talk is being accepting towards others. Letting go of judgment of other people, while trying to appreciate their faults, will pave your way towards personal and spiritual growth. Forget trying to figure out why people do things a certain way; worry about yourself! Yourself = self-love.

Of course, not all negative situations can be so simple and easily changed into a positive one. I believe by trying to take simple steps towards a positive thought process can help train the brain to be ready and able to handle the bigger issues that come our way. It’s just like going to the gym to train your muscles, except you’re training your brain.

I would love to hear from anyone who has had the experience of turning a bad day into a good day just by deciding to be positive about a negative situation. How did it feel to turn that negative thought process into a positive one?

robin bornsteinAbout the writer:  Robin Bornstein is a certified Reiki I and II and certified Kundalini Reiki I, II, and III practitioner. Robin has been practicing professional Reiki since 2014. She developed an interest in Reiki out of her own personal spiritual growth and development. Robin specializes in helping children and adults to find relief from stress and pain through Reiki. If you are interested in a Reiki healing, please call Robin at 508 359-6463 to schedule a free consultation.

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