Do you think waiting for what you want will make you happy?

One of the things I noticed about being happy and getting happy is that they are NOT interchangeable. We think by waiting for something—perfect job, perfect marriage, lose that 20 pounds, get that diamond bracelet, whatever—those things or events in our lives are going to make us happy.

An important lesson I have learned on my journey that things we accumulate do not give us the lasting “happiness” we are seeking.

Yes, we find happiness through our comforts: a partner who will love and support us the way we want to be loved, the right house in the right neighborhood, children that you will love and devote your time to, a job that will give you satisfaction, and good health. You may be one of those people who are fortunate enough to obtain those “necessities” that supposedly make you happy, healthy and employable. But something still doesn’t feel right, and it nags at you.

You can’t put your finger on it, but it always haunts you like a character in those horrible “b” movies where the “boogie man” comes out of a closet and scares you until you relent to its will or it kills you.

We all have a default happiness button. The usual categories are “very happy, happy, not so happy, unhappy, disappointed, not so disappointed very disappointed.”

Most will not know why they are frustrated or angry, but the disappointment looms over our heads like a dark cloud that just won’t turn into a sunny day. What is your happiness default button?

I am blessed! Most people will say that I have a perfect life, perfect husband, perfect kids, perfect occupation, but there is something that still doesn’t feel right.

I keep waiting for things to make me happy, almost like waiting for next drug dosage. Even though I have EVERYTHING, I sometimes feel like I have NOTHING. You are probably thinking, “What is she saying?”

The funny thing is all my life I have gotten “things, ” and yes, they do make me happy, but the happiness induced by material things or external circumstances doesn’t last, and slowly the happy drug
wears off, and I am looking for the next “happiness” hit. This time I need bigger and stronger dose of external happiness.

Jump start your way to happiness
Being happy is something that needs to be mindfully worked on. You CAN choose to be happy and decide how you want to start your day and set your happiness button.” Some people start off with some movement exercise. I start my day with a walk with my puppies, Kirby and Milo. While walking, this is my time to connect to God and have our daily conversation.

I have a gratitude journal. I spend a couple of minutes weekly entering my happy moments no matter how small they are.

Exercise your spirit – find a few minutes every day to feel your happiness. Don’t judge what you are feeling, but just to observe. Find what makes you happy and then build from it.

Choose to be happy now
You have a choice to be happy right now. How? Make a choice. Happiness is like a muscle; you have to keep exercising it to give you that constant feeling of well-being.

When I am happy, I feel –

My mood changes.
I am no longer waiting for things that I think will make me happy
I am in the moment
I feel peaceful
I have a constant sense of well-being
I have broken my chronic “when is it coming” feeling
I feel a deep connection to God
I enjoy my work

Being consistently happy takes mindful practice and time, especially if your natural tendency is to be negative. The first step is to notice where your thoughts take you.

About the writer – Helen Chin Lui is a Certified Reflexolgist, Certified Energy Medicine and Reiki Practitioner/Teacher. Helen is the owner of the Healing Place in Medfield. She specializes in helping people to find relief from chronic digestive disorders, chronic pain and balances hormones naturally. For her free report “Proven Alternative Ways to Heal Common Chronic Digestive Problems: What Your Doctor Doesn’t Know Can Keep You From Healing” click here for your free report.

To find out how Reflexology and Energy Medicine can help you,  please schedule a free 60 minute consultation by calling 508 359-6463 or go online to


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